No PMO War XXIV

So hello everybody who is reading this. Today I relapsed after no PMO for a month and a bit. - The mistake: I had an urge to watch something sexual a few days ago and I gave in a little bit. What do I mean? I mean that I didn't watch porn or tiktok dance or something like that. My brain convinced me that if I watched videos of women ASMR (whisperring videos) that I wouldn't relapse. Of course my SM said that it wanted it's fix for easy dopamine and because I used to fap it knows how to get it. So I watched it and at first I was fine I got my dopamine hit and it was done. But then the next day when I was bored my brain hinted that I should watch it again. I didn't watch asmr that day but, the thoughts of these hot girls got more frequent and more frequent until today. I watched an hour or two of ASMR till I busted a nut. Without even touching my slong. -The power of a peek (and the dangers): This shows the power of one peek. It's not just one peek, it's a chain reaction that demonstrates to your SM that you can go back to the easy dopamine in this way. A few days later you will give in. What exactly happend to me. Your SM will try to convince you with a softer alternative, don't buy in. It's a trojan horse trying to conquer your system. Once you let the horse in it will attack you from the inside with thoughts and ideas. You will start to fantasize again about girls you see. You have all these naughty thoughts and on a day you will not be able to resist these thoughts and go all out and relapse. Just like @Escape_from_Porn would say it's a radioactive substance. Which when locked away is safe to be around, but the very moment you open the lock and take a look, you will get contaminated and the radiation will spread across the entire body until you will die (relapse). Even though I like this thought, I like the trojan horse thought better. Because relapsing is more of a gradual process. You get exposed to a photo or a video and nothing really happends. But underneath the surface it will start attacking with thoughts, fantasies and more. Until the entire city falls ( your give in and relapse). -This is what I learned: Unlike other times I tried to quit, I actually made to a one month mark which im very proud of. But it doesn't end here. I am motivate to improve to go beyond this mark and to better myself so I can overcome this addiction forever. I don't feel shame or guilt unlike my previous attempts. I have feelings of joy, proud and motivation to beat this disgusting addiction forever. Why don't I feel shame or guilt? I think it's because I didn't make my personality that of someone who has a streak of say 10 days. I just impoved my life through screen time, cardio, work for school, relationship with my mom and so much more. I am motivated to become even better and work harder, because this slip up shows that I'm slacking. -How counting days will ruin your life: You are contsantly busy with the thing you don't want to do. Why is this bad? Well let's do an exercise: Don't think of a pink elephant. Let me guess, you thought of a pink elephant. This counting days reminds you daily of the thing you want to avoid. And thus making it harder to avoid. The more you think about it, the higher change you have of relapsing. Also counting streaks will ruin your progress in the long run. While you can get to big streaks (one week, two weeks, a month) which are great, but once you relapse you will binge a lot of porn. This will reset all the progress you made. How? Well if you haven't watched porn for a week and then you relapse and nut four times that day "cuz the streak has been resetted already. And then the day after you fap trice cuz "im at day zero it doesn't matter that much". And bam you are already at a zero days won score. (7days no PMO --> 7 times in 2 days). Instead of counting the days you didn't watch PMO (streaks) you should count how many times you fapped in a month/ week / year depending on your level your at. For me for example I have now fapped once a month which is let's say 1/30. But if I give in tonight again "cuz the streak is gone, then im already doubling the damage for this month 2/30 or 1/15. which is way more than It should be. If I continu this once a month then I would get to 11-12 times a year which isn't bad at all. What I mean is that you get a better sense off progression when counting times a week/month/ year than with streaks. Set a baseline of maybe you progress this month. Maybe every 2 days. Then your baseline is 15 times a month. Next month make it less. and the month after even less. This is progression. Streaks might seem the same but aren't because the relapse will just feel better and you will do it more. This is how you get into the tipycal cycles of I'm so done with PMO and then have a streak of a week and then binge PMO till your so fried that you're done again and the cycle keeps repeating. !!Warning next I will speak about my semen!! For those who won't read the next part, thank you for reading this long paper and I hope I helped someone. . . . . . So When I busted it was so strong it actually hurt a bit and the semen was very thick and had a white/ yellowish shine. Normally it's seethough and watery. Also normally when I shower afterwards it sticks to the hair of my balls, but this time it slipped right by and didn't get stuck at all which saved me plenty time cleaning up. Thank you for reading all of this. Yours truly. modernwisom

Very good overview of the dating scene and struggles men go through https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=be_Ms3nVG10 Summary: https://www.reddit.com/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates/comments/n0fdqv/decent_video_on_male_dating_and_sex_struggles_the/ >"dating for straight guys is hard in a way that is specific to men: guys have to be proactive. This is complicated by the fact that it is less and less the case that there is a commonly understood courtship etiquette that people are able to fall back on, which means that everyone is just flailing about like a bunch of idiots, nobody knows what they want anymore, nobody knows how to communicate or navigate boundaries or interest, and people are flaky as shit. Sometimes it feels like you need to be a mindreader to navigate this shit. >Most guys, even those desperate enough to seek out PUA advice, don't initially set out to hurt women's feelings, trick women, deceive women to use them for sex, etc. Most guys who struggle would love to be competent enough with dating and women to eventually find a compatible match to form an intimate long-term relationship with. Sex is part of it, but most guys also want affection, intimacy, etc. They want to treat women with decency, they don't want to make women uncomfortable, they care a lot about not creeping out women. They don't feel "entitled to sex and romance" - they just have a strong desire to experience those things, like most people who aren't asexual or aromantic do. >"be yourself" and "be confident" are meaningless platitudes, and those who need this type of advice the most are actually the least well equipped to understand what it truly means without amassing some experience (positive and negative) first. >"progressives" love to shit all over PUA stuff and other communities that give advice to men that is primarily aimed at helping men and not primarily aimed at enforcing political correctness. And while PUA stuff does contain a lot of BS and charlatanism to a point where it becomes counterproductive when not taken with whole lakes of salt, most progressives are actually completely silent when it comes to coming up with an alternative to PUA. They either revert to aforementioned platitudes or they just shrug and say something that basically amounts to "don't care, it's not a systemic issue, life sucks sometimes, man up" etc. >Because the people who claim to care deeply about people forming ethical, healthy relationships actually don't bother to come up with a workable alternative (since they seem incapable of speaking to the average man in a way that average man finds relatable, or take the average man's problems seriously), other than to shit over both traditional dating, and more novel approaches like PUA, this leaves space for extremely flawed things like PUA to grow to a level of popularity where its flaws become a real problem. Meanwhile, the void left by progressives is not only exploited by people who care about nothing else but getting laid, or wannabe life coaches and gurus who smell a profitable market, but also by outright right-wing ideologues who have stumbled upon a veritable goldmine of people who feel frustrated, alienated, and low on self-esteem, ideal brainwashing fodder."

Hey brand new "cadet?" here! I have heard about this website for a few years, but I've never joined a war yet and this will be my first time doing it. I've been going at this solo for a while, but my therapist says that I should get into some kind of sexual addict anonymous, but those didn't really appeal to me and so I remember this and decided to "enlist". I feel like this is better than sexual addicts anonymous because I get to see my progress with badges and checkpoints. And there's a community of guys that I feel like I can talk to more freely because there's not that face-to-face aspect so I feel like I can be more free with the anonymity that's provided here. I'm really looking forward to this and I apologize in advance if I come off pretentious I will try my best to be very humble because this is my first time and there are a lot of people that have been here before me and I have a lot to learn. My username is the enlightened crash out. I have one question on the rules. What is considered "peeking"? Another question: I do watch a lot of webtoons and animes and there can be fan service or suggestive images. Nothing overtly sexual, explicit, or pornographic. Is that against the rules?

I think this short video has a lot of great advice on how to succeed and become the best version of ourselves 💪 https://youtu.be/M0dAK6IQsSk?si=IleoYJ8rfGjMBYC2

Since some people wanted a gym war and NO PMO war at the same time. Here is the check in for your gym workouts.

I’m very pleased with the progress I’ve been making. I feel like I’m slowly becoming more and more me. I feel like I’ve lost myself, my identity and character through my struggle with P, however in the last 3 weeks I can feel a gradual and slight shift happening where I’m going back to being me. It’s still early in my streak because I had a slight slip 3/4 days ago but I’m progressing well and enjoying life a bit more. I know I have a long way to go still but I’m finally building habits that replace my need for P.

This thread is to log important daily events in my life and as part of the semen retention journey. Others can also follow my example and create their own threads, and note down if any urges happened / improvements were seen etc.

Hi @PierceFranklin I think it's traditional to have a war that starts at the stroke of November since the concept of NNN will attract the most number of addicts to enlist to beat the addiction. . . But looks like the current one will only end on Nov 2nd, and then the next war won't start for a week or two. So most people will not join or would have failed NNN by the time that war begins. . . I was hoping that you could finish this war before end of october (a truncated end, yes), give a few days for signup, and start a new one immediately on Nov 1st. . . Let me know what you think.

Bro I'm back. few months ago, I thought I broke the chain and I'm free from this nightmare. But I I'm wrong so I wanted to join back this community and that when I couldn't log in.(I don't know why. maybe technical issue) Thank God I was able to join today. So u guys r doing now.feels good to join u all and fight off this Monster together once and for all