No PMO War XXXV

In undergrad, I was horribly addicted to porn. I've posted on here before about this, but I was also in the drug scene. Smoking weed, dropping acid, drinking on the weekends. I had the option to try some other things (coke, h, dabs) but I was too scared. Basically my life was messed up. I graduated barely, had to drop a lot of classes because my lifestyle was so messed up I kept oversleeping and missing class. I thank Christ He saved me. I got my life turned around and went back to school for a graduate degree. This has been an ongoing effort for 3+ years, and I am finally gonna graduate with a masters! Just gotta take this last test today, I need a 65 and I pass the class. Abstaining from porn has really rewired my brain. I think and see so much more clearly, my thoughts are more pure, I have more energy. Thanks to everyone for the support! I could not have done it without you :)

How’s everyone been feeling during this challenge? What are some things you’ve noticed about yourself now that we’re almost a month in?

I was having withdrawals and smoked like 10 cigarettes and passed out for 24 hours. Had withdrawals and slept for 24 hours. Don't go back to day one

If an egg breaks from the inside, it means life. If it breaks from the outside, it means death. Everything that comes from the outside is meant to distract you from yourself. In society, it’s all about serving the “most important” ideas — ideas others had, jobs others invented, a 24/7 lifestyle others designed. Most people in the West live lives so similar that even the smallest differences make them envious. “Look, the neighbour’s new car.” “The boss’s new vacation.” “The girlfriend of your best friend.” And then came the greater hubris: social media. From that point on, the whole world could live in your neighbourhood. And of course — porn. You see one woman after another, each “hotter” than the last, yet you’ll never experience a real connection with any of them. Perfect for distraction. Poisonous for your inner focus. Being in your inner focus is like writing your own script. Life has no given meaning — but that doesn’t make it worthless. It’s empty. And emptiness is freedom. You can fill your blank pages however you choose. You can give your life meaning. Real change only happens on the inside. You don’t need to control what’s outside of you. You only need to control yourself. Nothing else.

Before: Depression - sleep all day - junk food and soda - low self worth After: Energy - sense of accomplishment - confidence - the hard things become easy

How is everyone feeling so far? I stepped away from the website for some days to rebuild in private. I was experiencing some depressed days and it took all my mental energy just to focus and ensure that I didn’t relapse. It felt like going through hell on a couple of those days and I know that this is the first time in my life I have managed to successfully get through days like this, which that has provided me with some great evidence that I’m strong enough to overcome urges and succeed. My brain has been doing some crazy things at the moment, one day I’m full of energy, the next my mind is completely flat and depressed struggling to find the energy to even get dressed in the morning. Yesterday was an interesting one, the first half I had no energy and couldn’t even stay awake then the second half I was full of energy and exercising in the evening. I guess this is all part of the re-wiring process, and I’ll need to keep experiencing this range of feelings and emotions until things finally start to level out. I joined a gym yesterday and have some supplements being delivered today. I’ve got a sudden urge to bulk up. It’s 6 weeks until the school Christmas holidays begin and I feel like that’s a good amount of time to get on a gym programme and start making some progress. Anyone else got any updates to share?

Really thankful to be part of a community like this, that take these things seriously. Shoutouts to whoever's idea this community was, you're helping a lot of people.