No PMO War V

Can you give a glimpse into the ideas of the book? The title seems a bit incredible.. overcoming addictions easily seems almost oxymoronic..

In my opinion it's a bs method…

While it somehow works for some, it equally doesn't work for others 🤷

@Jos92 ,im glad you asked

the method has a 95% success rate, yes you heard that clear isn't that remarkable it works ridicolously easy and has helped many be free, the only reason it doesn't work is because of fear or still wanting to pmo, this method works in the reverse as in your ignorance made you sin, once you educated yourself you will never go back and basically its supremely easy.

Stress: Life is stressful, and even minor stresses can bring urges to someone. After PMOing, they feel a boost, but have far more tension than someone who isn't addicted. Prn destroys your nerve and courage, leaving DeltaFosB to form powerful neural water slides in its wake, progressively destroying your ability to say no. Prn does not relieve your nerves. Rather, it destroys them. Also, you get pushed into crossing the red line, and when you fight against this, or succumb to the temptation, that generates more stress.

Boredom: When you have things to occupy your mind that aren't stressful, you probably won't get urges. But when you are bored and have nothing to do, then you have nothing to distract yourself from the stress, and thus you turn to supernormal stimuli. Boredom is just a state of mind. In reality, prn makes you more bored as it encourages novelty seeking. Concentration: Prn is a distraction which prevents you from having concentration. When a non-user has a mental block, they don't turn to prn, they just get on with it.

Relaxation: Prn is not relaxing. It's a frantic search for the right video + hiding it from others + straining on the leash of crossing over the red line, so how is that relaxing? The porn addict can never be relaxed. There is another smoking analogy: Smokers are relaxed after they smoke, but they're nervous and upset when they can't smoke. It's the same with porn. Non-users don't get nervous when they don't watch porn, because in reality, porn is the thing making you feel like you are uncomfortable and thus need relaxation. PMO increases stress and in some cases it is the root PMO makes you more bored PMO doesn't help with concentration rather it makes you distracted PMO doesn't make you relaxed rather it makes you uneasy and easily irritated.

The problem with most books and most methods that I've seen online, and even with the "NoFAP Motivation Videos" is that they all appeal ONLY to the conscious mind, which is logical. And all the arguments that you've just posted sound appropriate and logical, because right now we're reading this in a calm, conscious state.
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But, this is just "PREACHING TO THE CONVERTED". The conscious logical mind ALREADY knows that porn is bad. It don't need no convincing. We need to rewire the subconscious mind.
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Hard as it may be to hear it, (but this is the truth) porn by itself is illogical and hits your deepest pleasure centres.
Logically, you should hate it - yet you love it so much that you're addicted. That's why you're here in this website.
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That's why, when you're afflicted with urges, your conscious mind goes out the window. It gives up control to the subconscious which is completely irrational. No amount of logical arguments will convince that and all these arguments won't help you stop.
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I don't count day streaks, but I gather that I've escaped porn over 10 weeks ago. The only way that worked for me is having routines and placing safeguards (and make sure you're trained in those safeguards) that when the urges hit, your muscle memory takes over - that you do things automatically instead of hoping that your conscious mind will keep you vigilant.

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I'll check this book, just to see if it's useful, but I'm writing my own book, based on my experiences, and methods which I followed that to escape from porn, and master my desires.
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By the way - I don't know if you're the owner of the "MinuteWisdom" YouTube channel (where this book is also publicized and where I first heard about this ConqueredSelf Website). If you are - great work on the channel! Thanks for the videos and also spreading the word about this website.

Mind sharing your safeguards here @OxTiger ?
I am in constant search of anything and everything that I can use to my advantage against the addiction.
I feel like i have not prepared to the best of my abilities.
I am only doing ice baths and avoidance of porn.
Even i see something erotic by accident I do not get triggered instantly so I think this may be false safety considering how long I am using and the strength of my addiction.
I will be adding training as well as these past 16 days gave me enough energy to make additional changes. Not to many and not to fast, otherwise I would give up everything.

Cheers,

@skivuk what I would recommend You to do, to get Your advantage against addiction, is to dive deep into the activity of meditation.

Read this article below and let it inspire You about practicing meditation 😌🙏

👇

https://liveanddare.com/how-meditation-changed-my-life/

The main two safeguards are stress management and a diet of virtuous dopamine (copyright :-) ).
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First accept that life is going to be stressful. That uber motivated state which drives you in taking up good habits - it won't last very long. You need to have systems in place to handle the polar opposite days - the horribly depressing ones wherein you mentally eviscerate yourself reminding yourself of failures.
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Dopamine can be achieved through multiple sources, but for all of us, it has been the junk dopamine that comes from porn.
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Think of porn dopamine as extremely unhealthy, toxic, fast food that will destroy our body, and consequently mind, and life.
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We have dopamine from so many other virtuous sources:
Watching a fun movie, playing video games, sports, running; why even the act of sleeping gives dopamine.
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I'm at such a stage in my life that I eagerly await the bath in cold water (whatever the season) because that act gives me virtuous dopamine. Bluntly put - I enjoy baths in cold water.
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So find some useful activities that no matter the day - you'll get some dopamine from.
Try to fill your day with them. Of course, we can't be bathing for 24 hours.
Also, each activity has a limit to the amount of dopamine it can provide per day. Beyond that, it will start becoming a chore - no more dopamine but only frustration.
Unless the activity is your passion, do not extend it's welcome.
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Meditation is excellent as a general stress management activity. And it will give you little drips of dopamine throughout the day. I too have meditated a lot and have seen fantastic results.
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Also, have a quick-fix comfort activity - for when your stress/anger spikes. That's when we're most vulnerable to run to porn because for addicts like us, porn has been that comfort activity for a long time. For me now the comfort activity is boxing. I have a freestanding punching bag at my garage (costs $150-$200) and every time I feel pain/anger, I run to it. Every morning after I wake up and about to start off for work, I punch it for 5 minutes - it boosts testosterone and supercharges your day. And it gives you little dopamine for the rest of the day.
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I spend my free time watching boxing drills which I plan to come home and try out.
Earlier I used to be eagerly awaiting end of work day so that I could come home and fap. Now all I can think of is when I can get home so that I can punch! :-)
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I'm preparing the detailed book - it'll explain the system in 4 simple pillars. It shall be ready soon.

@OxTiger You did a great ✍️ out here 😌🙏

Will You share Your book when it's ready with the CS community?

@Chrisklb Thank you for the link and advice. Do you use guided meditation and if you do, can you recommend one for me?
@OxTiger Those are healthy substitutes. Its supper cool to be so excited about something new.
Yeah, porn was always my comfort drug. I keep thinking of my youth and any potential trauma, but can not find anything specific, or its repressed. Who knows.
Listening to a lot of videos on semen retention.
You mentioned some channels.
Check this one on YouTube "Teachings of the Wise".
Both of you might find it interesting.

@skivuk I watched videos from "Teachings of the Wise", they're alright.

I'm currently not practicing stillness meditation, but when I do I guess I'll try different types of such meditation.

I'll base my practice on the book "Practical Meditation".

People nicknamed this book as a meditation bible.

https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&opi=89978449&url=https://www.amazon.com/Practical-Meditation-Simple-Step-Step/dp/1465473416&ved=2ahUKEwjN5bDo2syCAxU9RvEDHb-NAGsQFnoECAwQAQ&usg=AOvVaw2_m8_fI6MrKGKuEFwItXWD