No PMO War XLI

I can also add an important detail - it's not always "for fun", it can also be one of the only sources of reachable pleasure due to harsh life conditions. A happy man with enjoyable life doesn't essentially need any addictive habit to please himself. So it's not only about willpower or perseverance, but importantly about changing anything that makes you seek for "quick fix". Good nutrition, sports, friends etc.
Don't flay yourself and start removing strains of unbearable stress from your life. Any addiction can be exterminated much easier this way.

These are some very good points. Yes, it's important to remember the long term benefit when facing the short term pleasure. Don't sacrifice the eternal for the temporary. And, it is also true that when your life sucks it is way harder to resist the "quick fix" so that you can feel something pleasurable even for a moment to escape the drudgery of life. In both cases it is important to mentally transport yourself to the future when you are a better person and to feel that satisfaction in the present to counter the temptation. Good points from you both. I'll keep them in mind.

Great points all around. I just want to add this: running from pain is a far stronger motivator than chasing pleasure. You’ll always run faster with a killer behind you than you will for a gold medal.

It’s easy to say “do it for growth,” but in the heat of a craving, distant goals often aren’t enough. What works better? Remembering the pain. The regret. The emptiness after relapsing. That’s your real enemy — and if you feel that truth in the moment, you’ll fight like hell to avoid it.

So yeah, PMO is "fun". But it’s poison. Choose to stay clean not just for your future self, but to escape the destruction you know too well.

One day at a time. Stay strong.

Absolutely agree with all of these points too, had a couple of mild cravings earlier today and seemed a lot more straightforward to challenge them with these approaches, @modernwisdom I really like the framing of “running from a killer,” and keeping that pain in mind is so key in all of this. A relapse won’t be “just fine really”, because even if you feel okay after one, it makes it harder to resist the next which likely will feel less okay than before. And so on and so forth.

It's problematic that brain doesn't understand the difference between feeling good due to actually achieving a meaningful, life saving things, from feeling good due to instant gratification things, and it's extreme variation in the form of drugs, orgasming, etc.

That's what makes it so uneasy to break from.
It's uneasy, because it's based on gratifications mechanics that brain uses for body's self sustainability.

In old days this mechanism were working in advantage of people, because their body felt good, when they were able to eat well enough and stay in relatively safe locations sheltered from possible dangers. Under such conditions rewiring towards the actions that allowed for people to live on was definitely advantageous and healthy. Nowadays this mechanism unfortunately got working against us, because brain by itself didn't learn the difference in circumstances of people, yet conditioning towards activities that brought feeling good in the body remained the same, and the bad aspect of it, is that the actions that can bring goodness feelings in the body are easily/readily accessible.

That meant trouble and we all know the scale of this trouble…

@Chrisklb You’re absolutely right — and what makes it even worse is that our most primal instincts are now being hijacked by massive industries that know exactly how our brains work.

🔹 Fast food hacks our evolutionary reward system. For most of human history, fat, sugar, and salt were rare and essential for survival. Now, these companies combine all three into hyper-palatable meals that overwhelm our senses and short-circuit our ability to say no. It's not willpower — it's neurochemistry being exploited.

🔹 Porn, hookup culture, and dating apps hack the reproductive system. They simulate the reward of intimacy and sex, but without the emotional, physical, or long-term connection. It gives the illusion of mating success while actually isolating us more.

🔹 Social media & gambling hack the dopamine/reward circuits. They don’t reward you consistently — instead, they trigger variable rewards (just like slot machines). One good post, one jackpot win, or one viral video keeps us hooked. We keep chasing the next high, even if 90% of the experience is mediocre or empty. The system is rigged to keep us wanting more, not to satisfy us.

The tragic part? These systems are working exactly as designed — not for our benefit, but to profit off our biology.

What used to be a survival mechanism has become a vulnerability.
And unless we become conscious of it — unless we rewire our responses — we’re just puppets in a system designed to keep us addicted.

Therefore with all this mentioned, it's important to work on relationship with the mind/thoughts, to not blindly follow up with behaviours to anything and everything that mind serves us with thoughts.

Critical thinking, deep self reflection and inner interspection are essential 🙏🏻👍🏻✍🏻

Great discussion guys. Good points and insights all around.