No PMO War XXXIX

I recently met up with my last ex, who is loosely connected to one of my friend groups, but moved to another city after our relationship. We were all cool, so we meet up like once a year with our friends before Christmas. It was my third relationship over 6 months, and I would say my best one yet, but it still was pretty disappointing. The one I had before was traumatizing, because I was the textbook beta cuck whatever you call it, completely emasculated by an (sorry but true) ugly and undateable person. After I started to show the same patterns with my recent ex, she broke up, gladly, because she actually had a standard, so I didn't slide down that beta ramp for years again. But since I have not been able to get with a woman again, because I am projecting my fear of another relationship in the same broken patterns on these women in the form of fear of women in general. So now in our recent meeting, because I didn't view her through love lenses, I actually started to see things I didn't like about her. Things that lowered her from my pedestal. Things that were there 1,5 years ago when we were still together. Things I ignored. But suddenly, I am not the only one in our relationship who contributed to its demise, and it actually freed me to see, that she also wasn't perfect. I hope this will give me the closure to pursue my new crush, which I have not been able to ask out for months, because I had this fear of hurting her and myself again with these patterns of limiting self-esteem. Whoever read this far, I take no responsibility for the time spent, I saw the need so I vented it out.😂 Have a great Sunday and a merry Christmas!

Everyday I feel lonely and desperate. I'm a 30 year old virgin, who's too stupid, weak and pathetic to attract any woman. I do admit that I have an addiction with PMO, but that's just the result, not the cause. If I was successful, I would've had no problem with it. But now that I get rid of it, will that solve all of my problems? Fuck no, I will be agitated, depressed and lonely, with no RELEASE!!! You think the people you aspire to be like complain about addictions?! NO!!! They do whatever they like because they have nothing to fear. Meanwhile, we suffer like pussies, thinking that making our situation harder will solve our issues. You think successful men complain about masturbating every once in a while?! I suffered through most of my life and abstaining only made me more uneasy and anxious. I'm sick of this life. If I have to suffer to make my life easier while everyone else get to enjoy their own lives regardless of what they do, then fuck them all!

I felt great winning the last war but failed just a couple of days after. I think not having the commitment of the war each day was a factor but I also allowed myself to buy a bottle of whiskey which shut down my defences very quickly. Most of the last week has been spent in a low depressive mood and so I appreciate having this new opportunity to fight once again. I will consider my previous mistakes as lessons learned and bring awareness to these potential issues this time around. How is everyone feeling going into this war? Is there anything in particular you want to work on or resolve? Good luck to everyone! Hitman

As men, we used to get rewards for winning. Watching porn gives your brain 10x higher excitement without cost (it seems like that). This is the same as heroin junkies do, sitting on a cardboard on the street with needle and feeling like king of the world at the same time

Sexual desire is part of who we are, but our essence cannot be reduced to it. We are more than a longing to love and be loved. There is nothing to be ashamed of. It’s okay to feel aroused. It’s okay to have thoughts or images that feel ego-dystonic. Having them does not define who you are, acting on them does. In the midst of this chaos, it’s easy to believe that the frustration and repression are too much to bear, that we are doomed to remain trapped in an endless loop. But I like to think it’s the opposite. No matter how dark things get, we still have a choice: a choice to live a life of freedom and long-term fulfillment, rather than one of short-term escapes from a prison we built with our own hands. Everything comes with a cost. Keeping your desires under control is no easy feat, it’s uncomfortable, demanding, and often lonely. But it’s worth it. Everyone wants to quit. Everyone wants to stay in control. So why wait? Why not quit now? Why not make a choice? What do you choose?

If you've even been on the no zero days subreddit, I think it's a good mindset. Do something small that you know you need/want to do today. Let that win fuel you, into the next win and the one after. Be grateful for those wins. I'm a mess, I can hardly talk to people in person. But I'm getting a little better every day and I'm enjoying this process. I'm hoping that fuel will help me be stronger this war.

@piercefranklin good day, will the war start despite us not being at least a 100 members?

The clock keeps counting down. Why? And I dont see the kia button.

When I started back in 2014 i became almost a superhero. I fell of so hard. My longest streak was almost a year. Not watching porn even longer. From 2014 to 2020 i didnt even watch porn or thought about it. I feel like im a complete different human being in a different time zone.